How I Spent My “Fall” Vacation – Episode 16

...you in the back pay attention there will be a quiz on this...

Episode 16 – November 15 – Denise woke me up at 6:30 to check my glucose levels which have been leveling out below the official 7 marker for diabetes. She told me the specimen had already been sent to the lab and Dr. Haaf had been notified of the problem. The pain was still there and almost as uncomfortable as last night.

Felly came in this morning as my day nurse and this was definitely a good thing. Because of the added stress of a possible infection, the new pain and a few other things I was probably at my lowest point since the surgery mood wise. I knew with Felly I would be getting good care.

The vampire dropped by again on the pretense of checking my hemoglobin but won’t they be surprised by Lee’s roast garlic mushroom soup.

Breakfast was passable because of the fairy visit last night so I got Rice Krispees with my whole wheat toast and fruit.

My mood did not improve after my requested meeting with the Occupational Therapist. The time frame was explained more clearly and I am actually going to be immobilized in the braces for four more weeks. My actually walking therapy will only be for a couple of days before being discharged and I will continue doing intense outpatient therapy for few weeks afterwards.

My mood was also affected by the apparent increased chaos in the ward. It seemed that in the first part of the morning there was at least twice as much traffic and noise in and out and that was with Art behaving himself for a change.

A procedure to get my exhaust systems working was performed. (Once again chanting “I never want to be a nurse”.) It seems the codeine and opiates weren’t the things causing my problem. Your body works at its best when vertical; when horizontal you are defying gravity. (Okay, that link is way off base but I through it in for Janice, Marla and Mo and any other fans of musical theatre for a little giggle. Admit you’re smiling now.)

The best thing of the day and probably the best thing that happened since I got here took place today. The OT department found a shower stretcher and they located a shower room on the seventh floor big enough to accommodate it. The trip to the seventh floor had a bit of sadness attached to it. We had to pass the Palliative Care Ward which was the last place I saw Lorraine.

The shower was surreal. I was lying on the stretcher being hosed down by two nurses the process reminded a lot of how they wash down the bodies in the morgue on CSI. It felt so good to scrub my hair with real shampoo. I admit I was starting to feel and smell quite gamey. I feel sorry for the likes of Pam, Dennis, Louise and Lee having to waft in my lovely fragrance yesterday.

The other thing I noticed while showering is that the pain in my side had settled down and I could only feel it when I took a deep breath.

Back in the room, Felly set me up to scrape off the tiny little hairs growing on my face. If it wasn’t for the fact that I was feeling so tired today, I would have said I felt like a new man. At least, I felt human again.

Just as lunch arrived, Felly came into change my dressings. Putting off meals here is not exactly upsetting.

It’s always appetizing to stare at incisions, staples, bruising and blisters. It’s funny, any guy who has come in has turned green even thinking about lifting the blanket to see the braces. Meanwhile, women come in and are right at it checking out even the oozing wounds. It must be the Mommy Gene. ;-)

Dr. Haaf came by and we talked about my side pain. He was able to confirm that it wasn’t a kidney problem but we would have to wait for the lab cultures to come back to determine if there is an infection of any kind.

I couldn’t believe how exhausted I was. I was only able to get through ten pages of my book, it took me all day to skim the Vancouver Sun and Province and writing this took forever  normally I’m on top of my writing and just keep updating throughout the day.

Thank you to my co-worker, Francis, for the kind words you sent yesterday.

Dinner tonight was turkey with rice and carrots. There was nothing bad about but I bring it up for two reasons. I am not a big fan of cooked carrots but I will eat them if necessary. I decided to forego them and substitute one of my mandarin oranges. How did Robbie Burns phrase it? Oh yes...”the best laid plans of mice and men oft go asunder”. I ended up brushing my teeth before remembering the orange. I’m sure you have all tried orange juice after toothpaste. Yuck!! I decided to skip the orange. The rice is a different kettle of fish. Any of you who have followed me on Facebook, will recall I keep whining about a series of gum and tooth surgeries over the past few years. My most recent has been a several staged implant procedure. The final stage was to be done at the beginning of December but I’ll be kind of occupied for the next little bit. The problem is I have a deep hole where that tooth is supposed to go and this is a great place for rice kernels to hide. I spend a lot of time flushing them out with warm water. I haven’t even considered eating quinoa for the past few months.

I spoke too soon about Art today, after staying peaceful all day he started acting up again trying pull the curtains back. I had to keep pulling them out of his hands.

My night was Maria. L hadn’t met her before so I couldn’t give you an assessment on her. Who my night nurse is isn’t not that crucial because I only interact with them to check my vitals at the beginning of the shift and then bring me my Celebrex for inflammation and that cute little blue pill to send me to dreamland.

So after watching Rachel Maddow and having my brain warped by her pinko, feminazi  utterings i laid myself down to sleep.

To be continued...