Thursday, January 10, 2013

How I Spent My "Fall" Vacation - Episode 71

Episode 71 – January 9 – Well today begins the eleventh week of my involuntary vacation and the beginning of week number 2 in the rehab unit. I’m still waiting to hear from the moron, Dr. McConkey. Apparently the concept of dealing directly with his patients is beneath him. Everyone knows that a doctor knows more about your body than you after all they went to school for a bunch of years. Some of them seem to think that those extra years of memorizing textbooks gives them a deity status.
We have Maria again as our nurse and she’s great but a little hard to understand when speaks fast.
It’s the charge nurse today, Kathleen, I can’t stand. She’s only here part time and I believe she’s semi-retired. She is a total bitch and needs to go completely. When you hear the phrases “I liked it better when...” and “The changed the format...” you know you don’t belong. I wanted to tell that I was still pissed that Plymouths no longer have tail fins either. Then she chastised two staff members for not staggering their breaks and she had to do some work while they were gone. That would be her job to make sure breaks are organized. Okay lady, you’re a lousy manager, a miserable person so get the eff out! I will give her credit she is very good at the front desk talking about her grandchildren.
My first physio session went great. Rather than wheel me down; Amanda asked if I wanted to try walking down. (Via elevator of course). We started off with a few warm up exercises on the stairs before actually walking up and down the stairs using only one handrail which simulates the condition at home. Then we moved across the hall to do more quad work on the shuttle machine. And the best part of this is that my favourite ex-cellmate and new found friend, Cheryl got to witness all this. Cheryl was there for her outpatient therapy. Sorry, Cheryl I forgot to bring to bring the...er...um...sparkling apple juice. But don’t worry there will be many other chances.
I doubled down on great friends today. When I got back to the room, my former classmate, Janice was waiting with a big bowl of homemade soup. It was delicious and filling. The only bad thing about it, I missed out on the tuna sandwich from my usual lunch. Damn, I may have to wait a whole two or three days until they bring us another one. Janice also volunteered to put her old lifeguard skills and help out with some water therapy at one of the local pools.

Amanda put me through a good workout in my afternoon first on the bike, then the shuttle and finally more stairs. For the first time I was actually tired by the time I was back in the room. As a reward for abusing me I shared with her my not-so-vast knowledge of Palm Springs recommending at least one restaurant and a few other things. Like me, PS was not on her radar until someone offered her husband use of their condo in La Quinta next month.
Speaking of travel, I figured I’d ask my nurse, Maria, about Columbia, because I was originally thinking about going to Cartagena. Good thing I didn’t book early for once. She sang high praises about the area. It has both the natural beauty of the Caribbean and a lot of history. I did as her what part of the country and she said Calli and by coincidence the care aide working today, Karen was from Medellin. I would likely leave both those cities off my itinerary.
Hopefully, I will have enough time between being reasonably fit enough to get around and having to return to work for a little getaway to recharge the batteries. I immediately ruled San Francisco or Vegas as destinations at this time because my knees would hate me if I sentenced them to those hills in SF and I know I wouldn’t be able to relax enough in Las Vegas. A week or two by the pool in Mexico or even Palm Springs may be in the offing. We shall see.
The other day, Dale and I made a pact regarding meals, if the dinner fairy appeared while one of us was out of the room we’d order for each other. Simple rule: everything trumps the fish, order chicken only when fish is the other option and jump all over the salmon whenever it’s available.
Dr. McConkey finally resurfaced at dinner time and I impressed him when I stood up in the dining room and stood and talked to him without any support. It looks like he’s going to let the physios work me without the braces and possibly lose the left brace altogether.
As per custom my night was capped with Rachel Maddow, a orange and one of Pam’s delightful chocolate goodies and a dash of Zopiclone.
To be continued...

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